Machine Gun Sheep

I've been wondering what kind of mom I'll be.

I know I'm a college student, and I have the white hot fiery potential of four hundred billion suns, but I also like to think ahead.

Way ahead.

When I was six, I thought of what high school I would go to, how I would wear my hair. When I was in fourth grade, I was already thinking of where I'd live after grad school. I've learned to live in the moment much more, but my old way of thinking just keeps creeping in. I'm a baby, but I won't be a baby for long. Soon, I'll be done with college, done with law school, hopefully a lawyer, and wanting to settle down.

I want my little girl to be named Adelaide. I don't care if it's a city in Australia. It's my grandmother's middle name and it's lovely.

My mom got married when she was in her early thirties. She had me three years later. She was über fertile. I don't think I have that luxury.

I want to have a child while I'm still in my twenties. I have nine and a half years.

A lifetime, and yet so short.

(I WANT TO SEE THE MOVIE BABIES, OKAY)